The Painful Pleasure (Episode 41 – 44)

Switch to Night mode

The Painful Pleasure (TPP)

She opened her mouth to talk, and what came out really surprised me. “Do you think you have anything that can make me have feelings for you?” She asked. My lips were shaking as I was really disappointed. I wanted to answer her question, but she told me not to. “Please, you don’t have to answer that question. You’ve said it all already.” I kept calm and listened to her. My feet were shaking in disappointment. She continued. . .

“Dapo, you know what? I have no reason to love you, it’s not that you are rich or special. There are so many guys that are better than you on this campus. You rarely buy things for me, not until recently that you just changed. But you know what? I have always chosen you. It has always been you.” She said. I didn’t really understand what she was saying, so I just listened to her. She continued “Since the first time I saw you, I’ve loved you. But what did you do? You took me for granted, and was fooling around with some slut. Anyway, I’m glad the whole thing is over. Do you know how long I’ve waited for you to tell me this? As you have said, you most likely do not have anything that can make me love you. But the truth is; if I love you because of your money, if you stop being rich, I will stop loving you. If I love you because of something that fades, when that thing leaves I will stop. Dapo, I have discovered that I can’t stop loving you. At some point, I tried to stay away from you, but it almost killed me. I can’t just stop, I can’t just stop, I can’t just stop. . .” She kept repeating the same thing, this time, she couldn’t control her tears. They just started coming out uncontrollably.

It’s like I was dreaming. So Moji had always loved me. How come I didn’t see it, how come I didn’t know it. If I had known that she has feelings for me, even if I didn’t love her, I would have asked her out. I was really confused. I didn’t know whether to hug her in excitement, or apologize for talking so late. “Is that a yes?” I asked her. “I don’t know whether it’s a ‘YES’ or a ‘NO’, but I do know that I want to be yours forever, and I want to spend the rest of my life with you.” She said to me. This time around, I had lost control, I was really excited that I hugged her so tight, as we both started crying as if someone just died. It was really epic. It was really eventful. I got a ‘YES’ at last. Apart from the day I gained admission into OAU, the day I gained admission into Moji’s life is the second happiest day of my life. We finished all the emotional display, and we said goodbye as late as 11pm. We didn’t want to leave each other but someone had to take the bold step. It never occurred to me to ask about her boyfriend harry. I just went to my room overly joyous.

I slept like a king, and dreamt of Moji. What more could I have dreamt of. I woke up on Sunday morning. Well, that is our free day since Matthew is the only one that goes to church in the whole room. Abdul was not in the room, since Sunday was his special reading-day. I told my roommates about the improvement. They were really happy. I used the change from the date to buy them drinks. We were flexing happily. “Omo, I happy say that girl love you back o, you for kill yourself”. Emeka said to me. As we were talking, a message came into my phone, it was Moji. I read it, and the contents were: “Harry is just my cousin in Canada. I’m all yours dear. I love you so much.” I got overly excited, and showed my roommates. “I told you she likes you, you didn’t believe it”. Mayowa said. Kindly hi ( boss) on +233544142683 to be added to his story room to enjoy more stories from the page. It was really a great day, as I announced officially to my roommates that I’m engaged. They laughed at me, but I was too excited to care about that.

My life was going great, as I started dating Moji. We paid Sandra her money. Before we knew it, CHM test was around the corner. I really tried so hard to prepare for the test. We wrote the test on a Saturday. And two weeks later, the results were pasted. I know my Matric number, and Moji’s own too. The test was over-40 so I went to check My result and Moji’s. . .

The Painful Pleasure (TPP)

I was really surprised when i saw the result. I scored ’11’, while Moji had ’26’. That was the first test result. Moji has shown to be a guru by having the highest score in the department. The scores were bad generally, but 11 is rather on the extreme side. I went to my hostel really sad. I didn’t even know how I was going to face Moji. I wrote post utme thrice to gain admission, but then I failed chemistry test. I’m not really surprised that I failed the test, since I’ve only preoccupied myself with emotional issues from Aramide, to Sandra to Moji. I didn’t tell any of my roommates about my result since results are always confidential. I just kept calm, as I was deeply thinking about the whole thing. At first, I thought of breaking up with Moji, but I can’t just afford to do that.

I saw Moji, she had seen the result already. “It’s fine dear”. Moji said to me. She really encouraged me. I just told Moji how weak I was academically, and Moji became another Aramide for me except for the prayer part. We started reading, preparing very hard for other tests and the exams. I really gained a lot from Moji. She taught me all the topics I found difficult in Chemistry and Physics. She taught me shortcuts of knowing the tough names in zoology. Moji and I were dating, quite alright, but all she did was to shield me and help me to become better academically. Aramide is totally gone, I see her sometimes, but we just wave at each other. As for Sandra, after I paid her money, she left me for good. I believe she got herself a new ‘machine’, since there were more guys than girls in OAU. Moji was my ‘Aramide’, she became just like Aramide was then. In fact better than her.

My relationship with my roommates suffered. I was always going to read. I was so scared, I didn’t want to carry any course. Moji is really brilliant, and as the Man, I needed to live up to expectations, by doing well academically also. I became sure of myself. I was really ready to face all the exams. To cut the long story short, we wrote all the Exams and we were expecting results. The results came and it was as expected. Except for Chemistry and Physics, where I had 53C and 55C respectively, all other subjects were A’s and B’s. My result was quite good to me, but it’s nowhere near my Moji’s result that has A’s except a ‘B’ in Zoology.

It was Part two. Moji and I rented two different apartments in town. (Don’t bother to ask who paid). It was in the same area. My place was just a stone throw from hers. We were always visiting each other regularly. There was a day she came to my place, I kissed her, then I tried to touch her. She refused. “Not until after our wedding”. She said. I quickly apologised to her and promised never to try such again. To be sincere, at that point, I kind of missed Sandra. It really made me stronger. I was once a weak-willed person, but dating Moji made me have a stronger will.

Moji is a Christian too, she goes to church only on Sundays, I decided to join her. We started going to her church. We made church ‘Sunday-Sunday-Tablet’. And our lives were going great. My academic life was going smoothly. I studied really hard. Although, Moji is always having better grades than me. I did all these for the remaining three years.

Soon, Moji and I defended our projects and graduated. Moji was one of the three students that graduated with a first class in our department, and had the second best GP. I just maintained my ‘2.1’ (Second class upper) honours. Luckily for us, we were both posted to Lagos for service.

My mum was really happy. She blessed me, and you know, what else can be expected of her than the ‘get a job and get a wife’ speech. After telling me that, she started a long talk. “You know what, my son. You are in a very delicate part of your life. There is something I’ve always wanted to tell you, but I knew it wasn’t time yet. But now, you are old enough to understand me.” She said to me. “Alright mum. I answered her”. She continued. . .

What next?

The Painful Pleasure (TPP)

“Alright mum”. I said to her. She continued. “Before you react to what I’m about to tell you, think about what I’ve done for you so far.” I didn’t understand what she was saying so I voiced out. “Mummy, I don’t understand what you are saying, but there is something I want you to know; there is nothing you can tell me that can change the way I see you. You’ve done a lot for me, and I appreciate all your efforts, no matter what I give you maami, I can’t pay you enough.” I said to her, pledging my allegiance. “Thank you my son, I’m glad that is coming from you. I should have told you this since you were much younger, but you were too young to conceive it.” She said. I became quite anxious to know what is so big that she had to use so much preamble.

She continued. “When I married Ayo (That was the name of my father that died). We waited for so long, but we didn’t have a child. Then, the doctor tested him, and said that he was sterile. I love him so much, and I want to stay by him. So I suggested that I should find a man, get pregnant for him, and pay him off. So I met a man called ‘Akin’. Akin was my child hood friend. And started an affair with him. My husband pretended he knew nothing about it. After 2 months of the affair, I discovered that I was pregnant. I stopped the affair, and the man left me for good. Since he knew the intention. Dapo, you are that son.” My eyes were filled with tears, they started rolling out. I couldn’t believe that I had been a bastard all the while. The name ‘Dapo Omisakin’ is not actually my name. My mum continued. “Please my son, don’t cry, I can’t afford not having a son. If not that my husband died, I had thought I would never tell you this. But right now, I have to. You are old enough to know the truth.” She said to me.

I was devastated, I was really sad. “Who will I tell my story, how will I explain it”. I said, crying. My mother was crying also. For the first time, I was really angry with my mother. “The only thing that can cause problem is if you don’t show me my real father. I said with so much rage. “My son, the man also died two years after your father died.” She answered. I saw uncertainty in her eyes, but I didn’t want to cause her tears. I knew it there and then that if I told her that she was lying, it will only make her sad. Making my mother sad was the last thing I wanted to do in life. So I just let it go.

Moji and I served in Lagos. We spent almost a year, then we finished the service. The night before we were coming back to Ibadan, Moji came to my one room apartment, this time, I really could not control myself. I told her about it. Immediately after the youth service the next thing was to get a job and get married. Moji allowed me. “You have really tried,” she said. It was the first time with Moji, and Moji’s first time in life (She was a virgin). I was really surprised that she was a virgin, despite the fact that she came from a rich family. My respect for her stepped up, and I was so glad I had Moji in my life.

We came back to Ibadan, and Moji’s dad helped me to get a Job in ‘Fuman’ juice company in Ibadan. My monthly salary was 80,000 Naira, and I was quite comfortable with it. I rented an apartment in Ibadan, and started living as a bachelor. My life was going great. One day, Moji came to me with a white envelope, as she looked quite sick to me. I asked her. “what is wrong with you, why is your face like this.” I said to her. “I was feeing symptoms in my body, so I went to the hospital for checkup. They told me I’m six weeks pregnant.” She answered. . .

The Painful Pleasure (TPP)

I took the envelope from her, and checked the contents. Pregnancy test was positive. Moji felt somehow about the pregnancy. But as for me, I was really excited. Moji is the one I want to spend the rest of my life with, so there is no issue if she gets pregnant for me. “Moji, there is no problem, Okay? My mum will come and see your parents, and we will plan our wedding. We should do it as soon as possible, before you become heavy.” I encouraged her. Moji was as happy as I was. We hugged each other. “Finally I’m going to marry the woman of my dreams”. . .

I got home, and told my mum about the pregnancy. She wasn’t really happy about it, but she didn’t talk much since I’m no longer a child. Moji told her parents too, and a date was picked for the introduction.

The day finally came, my mum, and few of my mum’s extended family members went with us to Oluyole. Moji’s Father’s house was an Edifice. It was a large impressive building. My family members kept looking around in surprise. The man is so rich.

We sat down, some people were already there, waiting for us; the groom’s family. We sat, expecting the brides parent to come and attend to us. Moji’s mother was the first to come. She greeted everybody and went back inside. Moji came out to see me. Her make up artiste had done a really good job. Moji looked just like the angel that she is.

The event was going to start, then Moji’s Father came out. “Akin!!!” My mum shouted. Everyone was looking at my mum in surprise, including me. “Cecilia!!!” Moji’s father called my mum’s middle name. I was really surprised that they know each other so well. “This marriage can never happen!” My mum shouted. I thought my mum had gone insane. She faced Moji’s father. “Akin, you remember that pregnancy, here is the boy!”. Pointing at me. It was then I remembered the story my mum told me. “But she told me Akin was dead”. She had lied to me. It was then it occurred to me, that Moji’s father is also my father, and that Moji is my half-sister.

“Cecilia, you mean one of my children impregnated another, and they are about to get married? I’m doomed. Where in the world is that done? This marriage cannot happen.” Moji’s father (my father) said.

Moji had been hearing the whole conversation. She came out, covered in sweats. Her eyes filled with tears. “You mean Dapo is my brother, and I’m carrying his baby?” Nobody could alter a word. The situation was really critical. I was crying bitterly where I was. Whether culture allows it or not, I had determined that I was going to marry Moji.

Moji’s mum was crying too. She knew the time was not a good time to blame anybody. She was just crying. One of my family members shouted “Eemo re o”. Which means “This is strange.”

Moji ran into her room, her mum ran after her then I followed. “Moji! Moji! Moji!” We were all shouting her name. She didn’t answer us, she entered the room and locked the door behind her. “Moji please open this door! Moji I love you. Moji, nothing can come between us. Please just open this door. I promise to take full responsibility for our child. Please open this door”. All my efforts to plead with Moji were in vain. People came to the door, as they pleaded with her. Her mum had completely lost control.

We had no choice than to break the door. Some men took a rod and after trying several times, the door finally got opened. When we opened the door, we saw Moji’s body lifeless on the floor with a knife in her stomach. She had stabbed herself. She committed suicide. When I saw the body, that was the last thing I could remember.

I opened my eyes then I saw my mum and her brother beside me, I was in a hospital. My mum held my hands and said to me “I’m sorry Dapo, Moji died, and the baby couldn’t have survived it. I cried bitterly. I can remember vividly how we were like brothers and sisters back then in school. I remember vividly how she used to say that we are like siblings and I hated it whenever she said that. “So Moji and I are really siblings, now I have lost the love of my life. Oh death! Where are thy strings! I just want to die. Please help me tell the doctors to kill me.” I shouted so loud. My mum was just pleading with me to calm down and forget about the whole case.

Four weeks later, my mum also died of high blood pressure. I decided never to love anyone again. And up till now that I’m writing this, I am just alone. My Moji is dead. My mum is gone. All I have is a father that showed up late in my life. He is even the last person I want to see. The best times of my life where the times I spent with Moji, but it later brought me pain. At first, I was really happy and my life was going great, but now it resulted in bitterness. It all became A PAINFUL PLEASURE. . .

*******THE END*******


Leave a Reply