Is it true that ARRANGED marriages have higher SUCCESS rate than LOVE marriages?
Marriage not only defines the social reunion between a man and a woman but also the reintegration between two families. Most western societies tend to deride arrange marriages as backward, uncivilized, primitive, and are thought as business arrangements made in order to join families for economic and social status reasons.
India is a country where many different religions dwell and a country where arranged marriages are more prevalent. Majority of the country lives in its villages where traditions are strong and because of this traditions which are still alive, marriages that are arranged are thought as being more successful than love marriages as they tend to take place in societies and cultures with strong sense of values of marriage.
It is true that when you think of arranged marriage, you imagine that how can someone agree to spend their life with a complete stranger…how is going to work? But, despite of what assumptions people have about arranged marriages they do tend to have a higher success rate. The reason being, in this type of marriages the primary emphasis is NOT on love, sex, and physical beauty but because the spouses get to know each other on primary level first, looking beyond trivial issues as beauty or lack thereof. The couples have much more common in terms of religion, background, culture, caste, and social status which is very important in establishing a strong foundation.
After living in India for 18 years and growing up in a joint family, seeing how successful the relationship of my parents and my other family members has been, I have been a strong believer of arranged marriages. In my point of view, it’s the traditions that people follow in India is what has kept the belief of arranged marriages alive. These traditions are not only important in laying a strong foundation for arrange marriages, but they also are major contributing factor in bringing two families together and making a stronger bond not only between the couple but also the family members.
On other hand, love marriages focus more on and give greater importance on physical aspect of relationships, and thus are obsessed with love, beauty, etc. Physical attraction is important in any relationship but it is not the only thing, as giving importance to physical attraction which soon wears off, then there will be nothing left to build upon. Moreover, in love marriages the couple wants more independence and freedom which can be a factor resulting in the couple drifting apart from their relatives and other family members. Attending family functions and following certain traditions that demand your presence can be an important contributor in successful marriage.
Furthermore, arranged marriages are based on facts (TRUTH behind LOVE), integrity, ambition, humility, and generosity. The thought of just thinking about humiliation of herself and the family for an Indian woman is devastating. That is the reason why when in arranged marriage, when the couple begins to discover each other, they will try hard to make it work. And when the arranged couples really DO learn to love each other, it results most often in a life- long lasting; permanent arrangement and will rarely end up in DIVORCE.
Arrange marriages are likely to be more successful compared to love marriages because while physical charms are transient, companionship born from common ties lasts forever. The truth is that, you can LEARN TO LOVE anyone you want to, and to LOVE or not is YOUR decision.