Sometimes in your life there comes a season when nothing is working out. Recently, I was spending many hours every day on the layout of my new book. I was learning to use a new programme, but with all the struggling I got to know it and made good progress.
Until the programme started crashing all the time. Although I tried everything, I couldn’t find a solution. It was really discouraging.
More storm clouds appeared on the horizon. It’s end of the month when you always wonder if things will go well. I was feeling really down.
I came across a long article about where our country is going, which made me feel even worse. Like everything became too much and I just didn’t have the strength to keep up.
I spiralled down into the black hole, asking myself: Is it worth it? Why keep on going? And the net effect was that my self-image disappeared too.
This happens in all our lives at one time or another. We go through a season of wondering what we are doing here and curling up in a corner somewhere feeling we are worthless.
Then, in a way one calls out with the psalmist: 6What is man and woman that you bother with them; why take a second look their way?
Lord, do You know how much I’ve messed up already? Lord, I can’t even deal with the pressure from my small world. Why would You think about this struggling soul? What makes You not turn your back on me?
And then, the incomprehensibility of God… Instead of turning his back on us. Instead of spitting us out, instead of killing us like small ants, us who are ice-cold, He welcomes us with open arms.
He doesn’t only think about us. He gives attention. He cares. He acts, and at the expense of his own Son, He saves us from hell. He restores our place in heaven and puts us just below the angels.
Our God is so great. He overflows with love. So how can I remain cowering in this hole? I have too much value to allow the circumstances in which I find myself to steal my joy and peace.
Although we sometimes suffer hardship here on earth, we must keep on looking up, because we know God loves us. Although it doesn’t make sense, He will never let go of us. He will give us the strength to struggle through the hurt and suffering. He will lift up our arms. He will give us wisdom to see through the fog.
Now I can face life squarely again, because God is so much bigger than the biggest hardship I can suffer. He holds me in such high regard…
What do your circumstances look like?
How do you feel about yourself?
How does God see you?
Father, thank you for thinking of me. Thank you for showering me with Your works and love. I can face life again simply because I know that You’re on my side. Amen.